You Are Where You Are Supposed To be

Oh really? This is definitely not where I want to be right now! Is that your first response when you read the title?

That was exactly how I thought for the majority part of my attending physician career. That was not what I signed up for. I did not want to be where I was!

You may not like where you are, but you are exactly where you are supposed to be. When you look back at your life 10, 20 or even 30 years later, you will see that particular part of your journey was to happen to take you to where you will be in the future.

Things are happening for you, not to you. By just switching the proposition in that sentence, the meaning of life changes.

“Things happening to you” sounds passive, as if there is no choice. It is what it is and we have to accept it even though we do not want to. Such is life. When I think about this sentence, I feel constrained, bound and limited. It is as if I cannot do anything about it, especially if that is something unpleasant or negative. I then start to think about how things “should be” instead. I think about how the alternative reality would be so much better. Then I start to dislike my current situation even more.

To believe “things are happening for you” – it is not an easy shift, but I am open to try to adopt that sentence in my head. This sentence, to me, implies that things happen for a reason, tailored to me. I may not see the reason right away, but I will find out when the time is right. It may not be a pleasant situation, but it is part of the journey to get you where you want to be.

So instead, I add to the sentence: I am where I’m supposed to be, to get me where I want to be.

Thinking this way takes practice. We are human beings. We prefer not to suffer. We prefer to have the easier way out. In real life, things do not always go the way we want, and that is normal.

When you come to a point in life that you do not like or you think you are suffering too much, remind yourself the why. Why did you choose this path? What is your ultimate goal?

Explore what you can learn from where you are. One possible lesson is that you want something better. You see that you are getting there (where your ideal destination is).

Remind yourself that where you are right now is a rite of passage. You may not like where you are. Where you are right now will equip you to do bigger and better things for the future me. Where you are right now is for you to learn and grow. There is no shortcut. There may be different pathways for different people to get to the same destination.

You are where you are supposed to be. Things happen for a reason. For you. The things you have encountered, the people you have met, the places you have gone to, all equip you to be the future person you want to be. These are events and experiences designated for you.

You are where you are supposed to be.