It Is Okay To Ask For Help As Physicians

There are certain expectations of physicians. Physicians who have undergone many years of school and training are competent, knowledgeable and reliable. Many physicians hold these expectations in such high regard that they believe asking for help is a sign of incompetence. It may also be a sign of weakness. They believe that they are supposed to know everything. They believe they are supposed to be able to figure it out on their own all the time. Some physicians may think that asking for help makes them appear vulnerable.

Some physicians who are almost ready to ask for help but the fear of rejection is holding them back. There are still other physicians who are avoiding to ask for help because they do not want to owe someone a favor.

Sometimes it is because physicians they do not know how to ask for help, especially if it is about their mental or emotional health. Sometimes they may not even know when to ask for help.

It is okay to ask for help, even as physicians. Especially as physicians.

Asking for help means that you are open to learning new things or ways to do things better. It does not mean that you are weak. It means that you are humble enough to acknowledge your own limitations. You get to share someone else’s perspective or their approach of doing a task. Asking for help may also help you avoid mistakes. You may be saving much time and effort to complete a task.

For example, a big part of patient care, besides evaluating the patients and formulate their plan of treatment, is to document in the patients’ charts. Many physicians spend hours after their clinical hours to finish charting. While it is great if they can figure out and execute a more efficient way to complete the patient charts, it is more efficient to ask for help.

That was my own example. I was seeing about 25-27 patients a day in the outpatient setting. While my clinical day was supposed to finish around 4 pm, I was making patient phone calls and charting beyond 7 pm, and oftentimes had to bring work home. I wanted to go home before 6 pm with all my work done. I did my best to be fast at typing. I got familiarized with the electronic medical record program I was using. I utilized the dictation function, the text expander function, whatever technical improvement I could think of – yet I was still going home beyond 7 pm. I knew I needed help because I tried everything within my ability but did not work. Going home late and believing that I was not good enough to even finish work on time also caused a significant toll in mental health and my life in general. I was focusing on how I could not go home on time, and how I had no life outside of work, rather than providing the best patient care and connecting with patients.

I asked for help. I joined a physician coaching program. In short, within 3 months, with my coach’s help and guidance, I was able to go home by 5:30 pm consistently. Now, after seeing 25 patients, I am usually done by 5 pm and go home, without the burden of bringing work home. I wish I knew to ask for help much sooner. I am grateful to be more efficient at work. Now I get to enjoy taking care of patients and enjoy life outside of my full-time job. I experience more pleasant emotions in general. I even have time to coach other physicians how to be more efficient at work!

By getting help with coaching an hour a week for 3 months, I gained more time by saving 2.5 hours a day, which means I have been saving at least 10 hours a week. Those were the hours I used to work for free – I was not paid hourly.

It is okay not to know everything. While it is expected for us physicians to keep up to date with advances in our specialty, it is impossible to know every single thing, even within your own field. It is important and beneficial to keep an open mind when you ask for help. Be ready to accept feedback regarding what went well and what needed improvement. It is a valuable experience to ask, so that you get to learn and grow in a much faster and more comprehensive manner.

Ask without the expectation of a yes. The person you ask for help may say no. It does not mean a rejection to you as a person, it simply means no to what you asked.

It is okay to ask for help when you think there is too much to handle, when there is a new task you are not familiar with, or if you want some emotional support. The more you ask for help, the easier it is for you to figure out who to ask for help. Sometimes you just have to find someone who is slightly more advanced than where you are now.

Asking for help means that you focus on how to be better rather than focus on how others are going to view you. You focus on learning and growing. You focus on efficiency, to save both time and money. Asking for help does not mean that you are weak. In fact, it means that you are confident enough to be vulnerable. If you do not ask for help, you may never get the help you need.